This was given to me at the mall today. Lul!!!
Does anyone really get into a relationship with Taylor Swift thinking “Wow I bet this relationship is gonna really work out!”
I just acidentally shipped my kid with my cousins….Don’t ask
All our children will be named after band members or T.V. shows.
*sets microwave for 1 minute*
* Quickly runs off to complete a task before your food is done*
*Makes the long dramatic sprint across the kitchen to reach the microwave*
*It beeps just as you grab the handle*
*Sobs on the floor uncontrollably because you have failed your mission*
At first you’re like
Then you’re like
Watching The Walking Dead. *zombie get really close to someone* Me: oh my god oh my god get away punch it spit on it DO SOMETHING!!!!
My mom told me that every time she sees boots like this they remind her of an uncircumcised penis…
When you get out of the shower do you dry your bellybutton?
Having a terrible day at school and then realizing you have left over Chinese food.
So these glasses are sold at Home Depot and when I first put them on I was light “What the hell is so special about these?” and then I looked into the light.
LOOK AT THEM!!!
Let your heats fill with joy by the sight of them!!!
I hope this post makes everyone run to Home Depot to get one (They also have snowflakes)
I just felt the need to share this with everyone…